I don’t like to be negative, BUT…
[Last update: 05.02.2020]
- “Haitch” instead of “aitch”
- “Almonds” without the silent ‘l’
- Those who are offended by swear words
- “Expresso” instead of “espresso”
- Whistling. Wolf whistles are ok as there’s a purpose to them; but aimless, tuneless whistling is unfathomable
- Those who use an acronym regularly without knowing what they stand for
- Those who ask the time whilst they’re sitting in front of their computer
- People calling their computer or phone wallpaper their ‘screensaver’
- Slow drivers. Especially those who hang behind me when I’m cycling because they can’t work out the dimensions of their car
- Push-chairs in obviously non-push chair areas. They get in the way, they’re lazy and carrying the baby is better for you both
- Dummies/ pacifiers
- Small talk. Say something worthwhile or enjoy the silence
- ‘Child on Board’ signs in cars
- Sandwiches cut at right angles
- Sultanas/ currants in savoury food
- Waiters who persistently try and take the chutneys away at
IndianBangladeshi restaurants. I need them for the duration of my meal - Waiters who take plates away while other people are still eating
- People who talk during the movie
- The Mail and The Express
- Bitten or badly cut nails
- Obese pets
- People who don’t cross out the completed words’ clues when doing crosswords
- People who put burnt matchsticks back in the box…
- …or sweet wrappers back in the packet
- People who pull the hand-brake on without depressing the button
- People who aren’t forthcoming in getting their round in
- The speed of the average pedestrian
- Men who tuck their ties in
- Short sleeved office shirts
- Your grubby mitts on my monitor
- Eating with your mouth open
- Pen-clickers
- Pen/pencil-biters
- Michael Gove, Nigel Farage, Mark Francois, Boris Johnson, Dominic Raab, Priti Patel, Sajid Javid, Jacob Rees-Mogg, Theresa May, Eamonn Holmes, Angela Rippon and Piers Morgan
- Electric hand-driers
- Wastage
- Heat, Closer, Hello, OK and Now magazines
- Fake Smarties on my ginger breadman
- Comic Sans